Four Times The Doctor Lied To River Song And One Time He Didn't
by DDs Tea Cup
Summary: Rule One.


**Four Times The Doctor Lied To River Song, And One Time He Didn't.**

**Not mine. Moffat's. In fact he owns a lot of characters I like.**

**Spoilers through entirety of River's story arc, Sweetie.**

"My firsts are your lasts River, that's rule 2. We can't cross our own timelines trying to catch the other at a similar point. We aren't linear. We run in opposite directions." His finger slowly traced her jaw line and lips as she looked up at him, eyes large with confusion.

"But that doesn't make an ounce of sense, Sweetie, as long as we don't bump into versions of ourselves we'll be fine! Surely we can pop in on each other where ever we want!"

He smiles gently down at her, young River, looking for a young Doctor, one who knew enough but not too much, crossing timelines and risking paradoxes just to be with him. He grabbed her hands.

"Trust me River, it's the way it is. Younger you knows things younger me shouldn't yet, but doesn't have the sense to not share yet and vice versa- there's too many spoilers to risk it. I don't want us to change what we are because we got reckless and selfish. Anyway. You shouldn't play favourites with me. You should like me however old I am whenever you meet me!"

She huffed and made a face up at him but slid her hands up his arms until they were wrapped around his neck. She smiled indulgently at him.

"Well fine. But I'm here now, may as well make the best of it - what are you going to do with me Time Boy?"

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"Amy and Rory? In Leadworth of course!" He spun around the console, feet slipping madly and hands darting over the controls. River arched an eyebrow and smirked.

"You're lying! I can tell- you always get a little too frantic with your movements when you're lying. It's like you're trying to distract me with your ability to flail." He stopped dead in his tracks and marched over to her.

"Am not!" Nose pushed against hers, eyes centimetres away.

"Are too." Hands slid around waists.

"Am not!" Quick kiss. A soft pinch. A startled jump. "Now who's flailing Doctor Song!"

"I know what you're doing, Old Man!" A smirk, wiped off a face quickly by hungry lips, hands sliding under the long tweed coat she'd never seen before.

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"I don't want to marry you."

He looked her in the eye as their banter continued, willing her to look deeper into his and SEE. Come on River Song LOOK! He was doing everything he could to make her come closer, saying anything to make her see. He could see the pain in her eyes as his words stung. Not wanting to marry her? Well, that wasn't even a little bit true. Ridiculous in it's untruth in fact. Especially given the fact in the 200 years he'd spent on the run from his death he'd married her numerous times. Oh how he loved this woman. This infuriating woman. Even now. Especially now. This tempestuous, wild, untamable younger version of herself. Ripping time apart to save him. To save them. Regardless of the consequences. Little does she know. It ripped out his heart to hurt her with his perfect words- chosen to hurt her, to sting, to make her see the futility of it all. For once he had a plan. And it was a good one. Thought out and everything. If only he could get her close enough to let her see.

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"I don't think about it." He shifted against her, arms tightening around her waist.

"Ever?!" Wiggling free, she rolled over to face him, arm tucked under her head. He placed his forehead against hers.

"Ever."

"How can you not? You of all people! Don't you just wonder how? Where? When? If it's still you and me?"

"River, I just don't. I don't like to dwell on events I don't get to change or see coming. Frankly just having you here, right now, in this moment, is enough. I don't think about how we end. I want to think on how we live! Together! "

"But I must die before you." His arms tense around her. "It only makes sense. You'll live on long after I'm gone."

"River, River, River. Don't. Just don't. Please. I've lost too much, too many to wonder how I might lose you. I can't." He breathed deeply, this lie costing him almost more than he could stand. Of course he thought about it. All the time. Dreading the moment she announces her expedition to the library. Dreading the sonic he knew would come. Dreading every hair cut, every new suit, every PhD course completed. Knowing every time he sees her is one step closer to her end.

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She was curled up in his armchair, surrounding him with her scent and impossible curls. He could feel her hearts beats ricocheting around her rib cage where his hand lay around her. He listened to her beautiful, soft, lilting voice bringing the words to life, he had read the old Gallifreyan story books hundreds of times, so he let her words wash over him and comfort him, a rare drowsiness overtaking him. His fingers idly traced her side and she shifted against him, a quiet smirk on her face as she read on. It was earlier in her timeline than it was in his, but they both knew these were precious moments of complete mutual understanding of each other. She sighed happily as she closed the book, nuzzling the side of his neck with her nose and dropping a kiss there. He smiled and squeezed her closer, no intention of running anywhere tonight. No intention of doing anything but this.

"Doctor?" Her fingers tracing the illustration on the cover of the book.

"Yes dear?" Eyes closed.

"Will you take me one day? I'd love to experience it myself, not just read about it." He squeezed her again, knowing this would cover the slight sigh before he spoke.

"Yes River Song, one day I'll take you to Darillium."


End file.
